Chapter 40: Dance Dance Revolution

"Finally!" Sonic and Shadow rose from the couch in one fluid, simultaneous movement, an action unnoticed by anbody in the hall, because at the same time, both large doors at the two ends of the hall had been opened and two processions entered. The crowd parted, revealing the red carpet connecting the entrances beneath their feet and looked on expectantly. Clothes were straightened, fur strands tugged away, a last few slaves hurriedly chased down and put on a leash again as everyone prepared to lay eyes on the two kings. Sonic could feel his heart beating faster, barely noticing how Shadow was attaching his own restraint again, the muscles in his legs tensing to rush forward, knowing he would be let go if he wanted to.

Then Shadow swore under his breath.

"Dammit. He still hasn't got it."

"What?" Sonic hissed back, looking at his dark-furred partner in disbelief. They were the only two people in the hall talking now, everyone else's attention caught up in watching the proceedings. Black Doom had entered the hall from the side of the throne, clad in more ornate robes than usual that reached down to the floor, concealing his lack of legs. On his head perched a bulging, black and red crown that shone wetly in the candle light and was encrusted with darkly shimmering precious stones, looking as if it had been dragged up from a cave underwater. Before him walked Lazar, carrying a small flag and a smug expression while being followed by four more servants holding some sort of brass instruments. They stepped aside and played a fanfare as Black Doom floated forward. From the other side neared what Sonic and Shadow presumed to be King Maximilian, who seemed to be a tall-grown squirrel of noble stature and expression, his light brown fur, white eyebrows and moustache immaculately trimmed. His clothes were less splendiferous than the alien king's, his blue uniform with the golden epaulettes and the silver sword more reminiscent of a highly decorated military commander than a royal but for the classic red velvet and white-rimmed cape he wore.

The lack of glamour on his part was more than made up for by his company, however; beside him walked another young squirrel (although she could have been a hybrid) who was a female and among the prettiest Sonic had ever seen. She had long auburn hair that appeared barely tamed by the braids put into it and instead flowed down her back elegantly. She was clad in a sky-blue long dress with a thin golden belt wreathed around her waist, but strode in a way that subtly suggested she was far from being as delicate and frail as she appeared. Her eyes were the same as her father's, as blue as deep water and as piercing as diamond, fixating her novel surroundings with quick, intelligent glances. Sonic took an instant liking to this Princess, and he could sense that Shadow at least considered this pair of royals worthy of a bit of his attention. They were accompanied by four armed warriors, led by a horse knight which seemed to be more of a formality, considering they were deep in another King's domain anyway. The two leaders stopped two metres in front of each other. Black Doom spoke first.

"I welcome you to my realm, King Maximillian," he rumbled, inclining his head the tiniest bit.

"I am grateful for your invitation," the male squirrel replied stiffly, forced to look upwards at the other. His daughter appeared scarcely less able to disguise her disgust at the monstrous' appearance of their host. "Let us hope it is for our countries' relationship's mutual benefit."

"I am sure it will be," Black Doom assured them. "After this dinner you should be more than convinced how unnecessary it would be to join Queen Aleena in her madness to eradicate our harmonious ways of living. But let us eat and drink first," he said, indicating the two throne-like chairs on one side of the hall at the left banquet table. "And perhaps your daughter Princess Sally would care for the company of my son tonight?" Black Doom shot a quick glance around the hall as he announced this, and Shadow realized that this was his cue and he stepped forward. There was a sinking feeling in his stomach as he sensed that apparently, his 'father' was far from giving up his marriage plans for him.

Chaos. If I were the real prince, I'd be viewing patricide as self-defence by now.

"It will be a pleasure," the Princess replied in her father's stead, her features carefully composed to conceal her true feelings. Shadow still thought he saw a flash of disapproval in her eyes as the crowd parted for him and her gaze not only fell on him but also on Sonic he still held on the leash. Nevertheless, she curtsied courteously.

"Prince Shadow. I'm pleased to make your acquaintance."

"Princess," Shadow merely replied, bowing in turn, Sonic making a compromise behind him and briefly lowering himself onto one knee. This seemed to conclude the ceremonial part, for Black Doom then announced that everyone was to be seated and the dinner should commence. Shadow and the Princess were directed to seats at the other end of the hall, opposite the chairs their respective fathers occupied. To Shadow's and Sonic's dismay, the chair on Sally's other side was immediately claimed by Scourge.

"A pleasure to meet you, Princess," the green hedgehog purred as he sat down next to her, his eyes flashing not much unlike Rouge's when she was in full pick-up mode. Shadow briefly wondered whether he should feel pity for the squirrel girl, first having to look at Black Doom before dinner and then immediately being set upon by what was probably this kingdom's resident molester, but he supposed he had enough of problems to care for himself, especially as Rouge sat down next to him. The slaves had no seats for them, but were mostly simply tied to the backs of the chairs and then sat at their owners' feet. Needless to say, Sonic was not pleased about having to sit on the floor after all, but at least complied. Servants streamed from side doors, delivering the steaming plates of food to the sitting nobles, the smell of fried meat and exotic spices delicious.

"So, Prince Shadow, your father and mine are debating an alliance," Princess Sally said coolly, obviously wanting to gauge his reaction.

"So one is told," the black hedgehog replied with some retardation, most of his thoughts occupied with trying to sense the Emerald anywhere, how they could attack Black Doom best from their current position - and what the hell Sonic was doing under the table. Scourge had bound Manic tightly enough to the leg of his chair that the poor hedgehog could barely move and Monkey Khan merely sat next to Rouge's leg dejectedly, but his idiosyncratic blue-furred pet hedgehog of course had grown bored in ten seconds and was now fidgeting around relentlessly, occasionally slipping under the tablecloth and vanishing from sight completely. Shadow made a mental note to buy some super glue the next time he needed Sonic to stay in one spot.

"So tell me, Prince Shadow," she said, not looking at him, her eyes half-lidded as she picked at some salad. "Your father is currently trying to convince my father that your system of slavery is justified as those enslaved have the minds of cattle. Is that your opinion also?"

"..." Shadow stopped mid-reach toward his fork. He wasn't sure how to reply – tell her the truth so the balance of power in the ensuing war would shift against Black Doom? Or lie, in case somebody was over-hearing their conversation and reported his deceit to his 'father' before they had been able to strike? Fortunately, somebody else took the decision from his hands.

"But of course it is, Princess," Scourge joined their conversation unbidden, "Everyone here knows that. Mostly they can't even talk properly, only howling and snarling like ferals." As if to demonstrate, he gave Manic at his side a shove with his foot and the poor hedgehog yelped, but did not say a word, merely looking at his Master like a hurt, literally kicked puppy afterwards. "See?" Scourge asked Sally, the squirrel now looking at him coldly enough to save this medieval dimension the invention of a refrigerator.

"Yes, I see pointless cruelty, General," she replied instead. "Please refrain from it in my presence."

"If you ask me so nicely, of course I will," the green hedgehog replied with a nonchalant grin, relaxing back in his seat, seemingly not put off at all. "But they don't really mind anyway. If you don't believe me, just wait until the demonstrations."

Demonstrations? Shadow's ears had perked up as he heard the word. What was Scourge talking about? Next, though, his contemplations were already interrupted.

"The festival wine has been prepared!" a voice proclaimed with grandeur as the doors were opened once again. Greytail entered in a somewhat less-worn tunic than usual, walking in front of a large, steampunkish-looking bronze metal cart contraption, which was pushed by a well-muscled pig. It consisted of a large basin, perhaps a metre across and filled with what might have been some sort of dark red wine, though its perfume hinted at more obscure ingredients as well. Over the liquid a burning lump of sugar was mounted on a skewer, the blue flames licking across the dripping crystal suggesting it might have been drenched with something more high proof. The most impressive feature, though, was the fire blazing on the lower level on the cart underneath the basin, red sparks dancing in the air as the wine was held on a near-boiling temperature.

Shadow ran a hand across his face.

"Feuerzangenbowle. As if this entire gig wasn't enough of a joke already," he muttered, although everyone else was eyeing the wine excitedly now and chattering in anticipation.

"The slaves may may now fetch the wine for their Masters and Mistresses!" Greytail announced, bowing to the assembly before then retreating behind the cart next to the pig and starting to line up a stack of extensively ornate golden cups so they could be filled. Shadow glanced around as various collared Sapients around them rose to their feet and were untied from their Masters' chairs, before then shuffling in a silent, eerily robotic procession forwards. He quickly released Sonic so the blue speedster could stand up and move with the others.

Scourge leaned over to Sally. "Ah, Princess, you're in for a treat. Apart from our quaint customs and pets, our kingdom is also famous for its spiced, mulled wine. You look as if you would enjoy...spicy things," he said again with a rakish undertone and a cocky grin that could almost have made him look attractive if it hadn't been for the predatory and slightly demonic gleam in his coldly burning eyes. Almost like Sonic and yet so different...the Princess didn't seem as if she would even grace that line with a reply. Scourge didn't need one. "But you seem to have no pet of your own to bring you a cup. Let me rectify this for you. Manic!" he barked the last word, the youngest hedgehog in their midst (if you discounted that Shadow was biologically seven years old, anyway...) flinching to attention.

"Y-yes, Master?"

"Bring two cups of wine, will you? Pick an extra pretty one for the lady."

"This slave will do so," Manic assured his owner hastily, inclining his head and then falling in line with the other collared Sapients, Sonic (who had watched the proceedings with distaste) following suit.

"Fetch him wine. Hah. Instead of sending you, that slacker should get off his olive ass and do it himself," Sonic whispered, only loud enough for Manic to hear. "I bet he hasn't had to walk or work once in his spoiled life..."

"Tha-that isn't true," Manic hissed back, Sonic pleased to note that the younger one was still brave enough to at least break the rules a little bit when it came to talking to him, "My Master is his Majesty's finest general and one of the strongest warriors in the kingdom. They say he crossed the Great Plain once in a single day, alone, when troops of Queen Aleena appeared on the border where he had been posted and he was able to alert the Palace to send soldiers to drive them back," Manic protested. Sonic's eyes narrowed as he heard this, his gut feeling now justified that the other wasn't just talk. He shrugged as they shuffled forward in line with the other collared Sapients.

"Yeah, well, doesn't excuse him from being a total douchebag."

"...what did you call him?" Manic actually turned his head now, looking at Sonic a bit taken aback.

"A douchebag," the blue hedgehog repeated. "He treats you like his personal sl...actually, nevermind – but he also hits on nearly every girl around without caring how you feel about it. I've seen those looks you shot him," Sonic said, having felt pity for the younger hedgehog every time his owner had ignored him.

Manic shook his head. "No, I mean...what is a douchebag?"

"Uh..." Sonic suddenly seemed a bit lost for words as he visibly floundered. "Uhm...I think it has something to do with, er, girls. And showers. Maybe. I think there's a pump involved. I actually don't exactly – look, it means he is a complete jerk, okay?" he asked, just a tiny bit flustered at the holes in his supposedly superior 21st century knowledge. Manic looked at him, apparently even more confused now as he tried to imagine how girls, sudden rainstorms, non-defined bags and the water pumps he had seen at mills fit together in a coherent, non-painful image, but then they had already reached the wine cart and were forced to end their conversation.

"This slave needs a second cup for his Master's company," Manic stated meekly, looking at the floor when it was his turn, and Greytail filled two of the golden grails with the steaming liquid, handing them both to the young hedgehog. Sonic followed with a "Just one, please," (and of course received the usual disapproving glance for his trouble) but nevertheless managed to obtain one of the cups as well, quickening his strides to catch up with Manic on their way back again.

Fetching Shadow a drink. Huh. Well, if we were at a bar, this would technically make him the girl, Sonic thought as he looked at the fruits of his expedition he carried and couldn't suppress a snort. Once again, he couldn't help but feel that it was kind of nice to do something for the black hedgehog, just wished Shadow would know he would also do it if nobody was forcing him like here...

They had almost reached the place were Scourge, Sally, Shadow and Rouge were sitting in that order, Monkey Khan just having arrived back before them, also toting a golden cup and now lowering himself onto his knees, presenting Rouge with the drink which he held in both hands, head bowed down and muttering something along the lines of "This slave presents you your drink, Mistress," but judging by the tone, it could as well have meant "I hope the wine contains a living rat and you die from food poisoning."

Sonic and Manic had already passed a couple of other slaves kneeling and presenting their owners with the beverages and the collared hero's heart sank as he could already guess that this might be the customary position for this ceremony and he was not looking forward to having to do this.

"Hey, do we all have to kneel down or is that optional?" he asked Manic in a whisper as they were waiting for Ken to finish so they could pass and proceed to their own Masters. Once again the younger green hedgehog shot Sonic a slightly disbelieving stare.

"Of course we have, that's the standard slave position to offer anything to your Master. How can you not know that? You said you were a Wild, but when were you even captured?"

"Last Thursday, actually."

"What?!"

Manic gawked at him with yet another baffled expression, but before Sonic and could explain (and maybe prompt the younger hedgehog to ask whether he had perhaps nipped a bit too much at the rum-spiked wine they were carrying), Rouge finally deigned to take the goblet out of her monkey's furless hands, smiling and ruffling his headfur a bit with the other.

"Why thank you, Ken. Sit, now, and make some room for Prince Shadow's and the general's pets to move through, okay?"

"Certainly, Mistress..." Khan grumbled, reluctantly lowering himself into a sitting position at Rouge's side again so Sonic and Manic could step past. Not a moment too soon, too, as Sonic would be glad if Shadow could finally take the cup out of his hands – whatever metal it consisted of, it channelled the heat of the near-boiling wine very quickly and was already getting rather uncomfortable to hold without gloves, and would probably turn painful shortly. For Manic it was probably even worse, since he couldn't even change hands with the cup.

"Why doesn't the wine get served along with the food? And why do you have to chase your slaves around to do it? This seems like a lot of unnecessary commotion and a waste of time," Sally's voice was heard, the Princess actually sounding more like a military commander in a war room complaining about a lack of efficiency and common sense, as if even in the midst of this twisted kingdom she still couldn't entirely switch off her sense of logic. Scourge shook his head, sighing akin a grown adult who once again had to explain things to the little girl.

"The atmosphere counts, my Princess," he said as it was now Manic's turn to kneel down and hold up both cups to proffer them to his owner. Scourge didn't seem to make any attempt to take them yet, though, rather continuing his lecture to his squirrel neighbour. "Nearly every beverage tastes sweeter if it is submitted to you by an endearing pet that longs to serve you, and goes to any lengths to do so. For example, look here," he said, ignoring a subtle whimper from Manic at this point as he bent forward and seemed to take genuine delight in pointing something out to the Princess. "The cups are, at this point in time, rather hot too hold. Still, a slave is not allowed to rise from this position until his Master has accepted whatever he's offering," he explained, still giving off an air not unlike Sonic when he had found something curious and was now showing it enthusiastically to Tails or Shadow, which somehow made the display even worse. Sally began to look appalled as it crept up on her what the point of this presentation was and none but Shadow even thought to look up at Sonic who at the moment still stood behind the kneeling Manic and the seated nobles, his eye ridges now drawing together like the thunderclouds before a storm. His cup had gotten too hot for prolonged skin contact a few moments ago and consequently, he was balancing it on the flat of his hand now, where the fingerless black leather glove protected his palm, but he could guess what kind of pain Manic was in.

"General Scourge, I want you this very moment to-" Sally began, but once again, Scourge interrupted her. "Ah-ah, Princess, you're here to learn our ways, I hear," he said with a smug grin. "So learn; nobody is forcing him, but he is enduring this discomfort because he longs to serve me anyway. Our pets are happy with their treatment."

"Master...pl...please..." Manic begged at this point, almost to silent to be heard, the cups in his fingers now trembling but still he didn't dare get up.

"Imagine soldiers this loyal, Princess. Imagine servants that diligent. I don't think any of your employees would ever be this devoted."

And then a single wet drop appeared on the stone beneath Manic's face and suddenly, things went very fast.

"I heard your mother was murdered by a traitorous castle guard," Scourge said to Sally, before then actually laying a black-gloved hand on her knee, the other on his chest. "Believe me, if that guard had been one of my slaves, personally trained by me, such an action would have been impossible for him. They don't know the meaning of disobedience. And all of this pain you could have been spa-"

At which point Sonic stepped around very neatly around the kneeling Manic, ever so accidentally tripped over the younger one's foot, and one serving of boiling hot wine poured very adroitly straight in Scourge's lap.

xxx

"Hi again," Tails began the conversation timidly as he was now alone with Sonic in a room. "You don't have to be afraid," he said, feeling slightly weird to say this to the Mobian who had been his hero as long as he could remember, "I just want to ask you a few questions."

The other nodded, even if he was still staring at the floor. He also seemed curiously stubborn to remain sitting on the carpet instead of the seat.

"Have you maybe been reading some...different comic books recently?" Tails asked. The other shook his head.

"No, I am not able to read," he said quietly. Tails crossed his arms.

"Right, and this is another lie. Don't try to make up stuff, you know I can always tell when you're not straight with me."

"What?" For the first time, emerald eyes snapped up to actually look at him, even if wide in fear and shocked surprise. "But you can't, only my Master can-" He paused. "Tails..."

The young fox' heart skipped a beat.

"You remembered my name! Is finally something coming back to you?" he asked excitedly, throwing the sheet away. Sonic only appeared ever more confused, finally pointing at something behind him.

"Uh, no, I just...noticed your tails. You've got two of them," he pointed out helpfully. Tails' shoulders sagged.

"...yeah. I kind of knew that."

"They're very interesting," Sonic assured him. "When you were born, did your village assume you were a bad omen sent by the gods?"

Tails was pretty sure that if his namesakes had been able to sweat-drop, they would have done so now.

xxx

"AAAAAAAAAAAH-!"

At the moment, most of the guests present were agreeing that they probably had never heard a general scream so loudly, or this high-pitched.

"Master!" Manic yelled, finally able to put the goblets down and rush to his owner's aid, proffering a serviette. "What can this slave do to help you?" he asked, looking genuinely distressed.

"Fetch me some ice, idiot! Or cold water!" Scourge yipped, and the green-furred hedgehog nodded and obediently rushed off, which was a relief to Sonic – at least, carrying the ice would mean balm to the poor hedgehog slave's burnt hands.

"YOU!" Of course, Scourge now turned his attention straight to him.

"Oh no, this slave is so incredibly sorry," Sonic shook his head with a mock expression of distress, generally giving a performance unworthy of fifth-grade school theatre, while two seats away, Shadow seemed busy having slight shell-shock syndrome, "Would your greeniness prefer new clothes? This slave suggests perhaps re-using some of the tailfeathers you forced onto your poor hedgehog - seeing as you already seem to have a peacock-complex anyw-"

This was as far as he came before Scourge had already rushed forward and grabbed Sonic on his collar, yanking him off his feet so harshly, the blue hedgehog nearly choked for a moment. Still, even as he was pulled into his enemy's face, he didn't fight back, merely letting himself be manhandled and instead put a little more effort into his pleading, actually adding a little over-acted fear now.

"Uh, please don't hurt this slave, it - it was an accident, this one swears!"

"You," Scourge snarled again, "I knew from the start there was something wrong with you."

"No!" Sonic protested. "This slave tries, really, wants to please the Master, swears to serve the Master - "an idea seemed to strike him and he turned his head to the other side, "-but evil hobbitses made us do it, yes, yes!"

There was a bit of wtf-silence from Scourge's side, accompanied by with an appropriate facial expression, and then a head-desk noise from Shadow, who just seemed to have overcome his BlueScreen-moment.

But then Scourge drew his sword. He held it at Sonic's throat. The blue hedgehog had stopped acting now and was merely glaring up into captor's face again, emerald eyes full of righteous anger. He wasn't yet making a move to physically confront scourge, though his body had tensed when the blade had been drawn. "Right. You think this is funny," the noble snarled, "Obviously, you have never been punished enough to learn that it isn't. So, I think I need to rectify that - I am going to hurt you. Right here, right now. But I am not going to kill you. I am going to boil you alive, bit by bit, until even your tongue is too swollen to scream. Do you want to beg some more?"

Shadow rose in the background, apparently ready to step in before Scourge could fulfil his promise, but was cut off by another voice.

"General Scourge, I ask you to stop this at once!"

"What?" the green hedgehog turned around, sword still at the side of the other's neck and seemed severely irritated by this sudden interruption from Princess Sally, who had now risen from her chair.

"He stumbled. It was an accident. You can't execute him for that, it could happen to anybody!"

"Princess, that is the beauty of slavery. I can. Instant justice," Scourge replied coolly, and Sonic had a feeling that if this guy had owned an anachronistic pair of sunglasses, he would right now have looked over their brim at the squirrel girl. Princess Sally crossed her arms.

"Harm a hair on that poor, terrified slave's head in my presence and I won't speak a word with you as long as I live."

"Wha – but Princess!" the green hedgehog protested, Sonic again privately thinking that the general probably would have added a 'That is so not cool!' if he had only known slang he had been born 400 years too early for.

Shadow, meanwhile, could only blink as he began to realize that his impossible slave had probably calculated on the squirrel's intervention into his untimely death even before he had poured the wine into Scourge's lap, which was why he had been so relaxed the entire time. Right now the Ultimate Lifeform was very unhappy that all alcohol in question had already been spilled.

"I don't approve of pointless cruelty, general," Princess Sally stated, her voice sounding sharp and firm enough that an entire horde of rampaging Vikings hearing it probably would have apologized for their behaviour and started cleaning up the village, "I request you let this slave go and resume your place at this table. There will be no bloodshed this night in my presence."

Heh, quite the queen material, Sonic couldn't help but think a bit smugly, as the choke-hold on his collar was released and the sword sheathed again – not without cutting the side of his neck ever so slightly as if by accident, of course. Scourge shot him a look of pure poison and then turned around to the Princess again, now ignoring Sonic entirely.

"Very well. For you, my Princess, because I have a soft spot. But you should know I'm going out of my way, here."

"It is appreciated," the ground squirrel replied primly, the formality of her speech once again clashing sharply with the coarse language of the general obviously not used to High Society. Manic had just returned with some towels soaked in cold water and Scourge took them considerably quicker this time, applying them to the burned spots with a bit of a wince. Fortunately, the commotion seemed to die down again now, especially since nearly nobody had noticed anything up to the point where Scourge had howled like a feral cat trapped in a car wash machine anyway, and the dinner could continue; the only difference that Rouge now occasionally tipped Scourge on the shoulder and then gave a rather squeaky imitation of someone getting something hot poured onto their crotch. The green hedgehog glared daggers at her in response, while Sonic mostly broke into snickering underneath the table every time, and even Shadow couldn't suppress a small smirk. Of course, the thing that delighted the hero of Mobius the most was that Monkey Khan also seemed to derive some amusement from the antics of his Mistress and even Manic had to give a small, nervous giggle at least once.

Soon after, a steaming steak was placed in front of Shadow and the Ultimate Lifeform, starving for days now, had trouble to keep the saliva from pooling in his mouth as he neared the thing with his knife...

"Hey!" a hiss came from below. "Feed me, I'm hungry!"

"You had something before," Shadow protested, glad nobody was paying them any attention right now. "Besides, after what you did before the only thing you deserve would be a helping of whatever pills they give clinically insane maniacs and a side dish of valium." At his side, Sonic was pouting up at him.

"I had a plate full of starters, but that was my first food since yesterday morning. I need more."

"Yeah, well, you're not going to get any."

As a response, the next thing he knew, Sonic's head was in his lap.

"What the hell are you doing?"

Shadow shifted forward with a jerk, so the tablecloth could cover his legs and Sonic atop them. The blue hedgehog had to hold back a laugh - so far, he had rarely had the pleasure of seeing Shadow's eyes widen in true panic. He shifted his weight a little, now kneeling next to his supposed Master's chair, tan arms folded on a black leg and the blue hedgehog's head lying atop them.

"Oh, you know..." Sonic whispered quietly, at the same time idly doodling a line on his pretend owner's thigh with a finger, "Just wondering what a pet has to do to get some food at the table."

"Stop...it...!" Shadow commanded under his breath, trying to kick his legs to shake Sonic off, but without attracting attention. He ground his teeth as he thought he could hear a giggle from under the table.

"My Prince, are you alright?" Rouge asked from the side as she noticed her royal friend squirming at her side and Shadow took a deep breath as he tried to compose himself enough to answer her – which unfortunately was the exact point when Sonic had decided to lean forward a little and give a teasing lick over the Ultimate Lifeform's hip bone.

There were several heads that turned as the heir to the throne effortlessly crushed the wine glass he had just held in a spasm of his hand.

"Gah!"

"Um...apparently not?" Rouge suggested, now looking more than concerned when Shadow now seemed to have trouble breathing and also had a faint touch of red on his cheeks.

"It's...nothing..." he managed. "I just...spilled my food..."

"What? You destroyed your glass, but your food is still-" the bat pointed out, but was interrupted when Shadow deliberately moved his hand and brushed the plate in front of him off the table and onto the floor.

"Butterfingers. Now I did. I think I'm not myself today," Shadow apologized (entirely truthfully) in a dead-pan tone. Fortunately, it also meant that because his neighbours were so busy staring at this outlandish behaviour of their resident Prince, that nobody noticed the tan-furred hand shooting out from under the tablecloth, catching the plate before it could hit the floor and then promptly disappearing again. When a servant quickly arrived to clear off the mess and bring new food for Shadow, Sonic had already sat himself next to Shadow's side again, now looking a lot more content than before. The fact that a very frustrated Shadow twisted his ear rather forcefully as soon as things had quieted down again let the blue hedgehog wince in pain, but he still couldn't suppress a small grin afterwards, even if he had just been punished. After all, Sonic had endured much worse than getting his ear yanked and he didn't begrudge his supposed Master the little revenge.

"Prince Shadow, I already asked General Scourge to refrain from abusing your...slaves...like this without reason. I would kindly beg of you to honour this request as well, for my sake, if not for his," Sally's voice interrupted their little play-fight, and Shadow was all at once confronted with a cool blue stare from this Princess that spoke as courteously as a court maiden, but with an undertone of a warrior's steel. The Ultimate Lifeform thought he could see a fire blazing in those eyes that told of a compassion she felt for the collared Sapients that was as great as Sonic's. At the moment it still seemed overshadowed by an even greater self-discipline though, even if her sense of justice might have been screaming inside.

"Yes, Princess Sally. I apologize if I have disturbed you," Shadow said curtly, trying to finally focus on his fresh plate of food. The whispered comment dripping with melodrama of 'See? Finally someone points out the daily cruelties you heap on me!' from below already made him want to use his fork to stab something entirely different than potatoes, of course.

"I wish they'd start the show already," Scourge said, supporting his chin with one hand and poking the rest of food on his plate with a spoon. "I don't feel very entertained, and those incompetent musicians back there ain't helping."

He was, of course, referring to the Chaotix who were currently playing just like their name suggested – the result rather painful to listen to and Shadow was still wondering which one of that group of comedians had had the insane idea to give Charmie the damn cymbals.

"I hate Scourge, but he has a point. They're great guys, but currently they're making my ears bleed," Sonic mumbled from below. He had spied the Chaotix earlier already, but hadn't been able to greet them as he had already been on Shadow's leash again at this point. Shadow hadn't yet told Sonic of their actual identity as undercover agents for whatever cause either, mostly because that would have simply spiked his supposed slave's curiosity. At the moment the troupe would have to watch out that Black Doom would refrain from killing them for their torture of innocent instruments, anyway...

"Lords and Ladies!" the voice of the alien king rang out through the hall at this moment, and the music (read: the noise) ceased like the conversations as their horned ruler rose from his chair. "King Maximilian is honouring the court with his attendance tonight and I trust he finds the festivities to his liking!" he proclaimed and there was a courteous applause. "The future of our way of life must be assured and thus, we will present it to him with all the splendour and richness our traditions yield. I hereby command the Presentation to begin!" Black Doom's distorted voice boomed and immediately, there began some movement in the back of the hall. So far, Shadow had assumed that the deep red curtain that was covering the back wall was merely there for decoration, but now it was pulled aside to the left and right to reveal a stage – a wooden construction with actual wings off to both sides and another door in the back where performers presumably could enter and exit. There were little gasps from here and there in the audience from attendants who obviously hadn't seen it before and appreciative murmurs. Shadow's expression turned slightly sour when what happened next was none other than Lazar climbing the stairs at the side and positioning himself in the center, holding up a scroll as if he was going to hold a speech now. The Ultimate Lifeform idly wished that there was a lever somewhere he could pull so the purple lizard's performance would find a rather abrupt end involving a stage trapdoor.

"What? What's going on?" hissed Sonic, who was unable to see anything due to his lower viewpoint. Shadow shushed him into silence, and when Lazar began to speak, the blue hero would have had to have been deaf to be unaware of the most recent development.

"Welcome!" the purple reptile proclaimed, yellow eyes gleaming and black, forked tongue flicking in delight, "To thisss mosst recent pressentation of our nation'ss prowesss."

Princess Sally's head turned as she wondered why not only did this presenter seem to have a speech impairment, but also where the two nearly simultaneous groans had just come from at her side.

"Tonight our performerss will sshow you what wonderss can be achieved when a body can be sshaped by sssuperior mindss, when the life of a lowly creature can be put to usse to create sssomething outsstanding when otherwisse itss feral exissstence would have been meaninglesss and wassted. Thosse that we keep ass workerss, thosse that we keep asss petss – for their happinesss much more than for ourss – will entertain you during thiss evening asss their Massterss have worked relentlesssly to train them for your viewing pleassure!"

"Oh no...the poor things..." Shadow heard Sally whisper next to him as a polite applause ensued while the curtain was briefly lowered again to prepare the stage for the first performers. The black hedgehog couldn't say he was looking forward to this spectacle either. He finally wanted to lay his hands on that Emerald and was getting frustrated that Black Doom apparently wasn't planning on showcasing it any time soon, at the least not before this very literal circus was over. Scourge used the Princess' distress to lay a clutching hand on her shoulder.

"Don't you worry your beautiful head, Princess. It will be entertaining, I promise. And you would do well to show your appreciation, because afterwards, his Majesty will also grace us with a demonstration of our latest prowess in martial power, a weapon like you have never seen one before." He grinned. "To put it bluntly, when your esteemed father sees this, he will be sure to agree to the alliance, as anything else would be madness. And don't you know, perhaps you would care for some relations with our kingdom, too..." he let the sentence trail off suggestively, and only smirked broader when the female squirrel knocked his hand off her shoulder by pretending to adjust her hair and only accidentally ramming her elbow against his arm.

"I'll let you know when that time comes," she said frostily. "For now, I think I would prefer relations to those that you claim mindless beasts over anyone at this table."

"Fiery, isn't she?" Rouge chuckled at Shadow's side, the two of course having overheard the exchange. "Reminds me a bit of Queen Blaze, that one. I for one wouldn't mind if she put down that obnoxious general some more..."

"Quite," Shadow replied, still not actually looking at Rouge, but knowing that Sonic's heart was probably beating faster in tune with his own now. Finally they had been given a date when they would strike!

"Honoured attendantsss, the firssst perfomer!" Lazar announced at this point, the curtain being drawn aside again as the stage was now filled with what looked like the hoops and pedestals of a circus show. "He hass captured the exotic beauty of the southern jungless, jusst for you to feasst your eyess upon it! Pleasse enjoy thiss triumph of mind over feral matter! For you – Snively the Tamer!"

Sonic wondered for a moment why Shadow for a moment seemed to become chalk white under his fur, but then visibly relaxed again – it was a mounting source of annoyance for the blue hedgehog not being able to see what was happening on stage. "What are they doing?" he hissed.

"Not much yet," Shadow whispered back. "So far it's just an aardvark on stage and he looks seriously mangy. But I'm warning you, I'm not keeping up a running commentary," the black hedgehog muttered, still not able to tear his gaze from the stage. Snively the Aardvark not only had his species' characteristic long snout more than reminiscent of an absurdly long nose and bald patches on his head, but was also wearing a broccoli-green linen shirt that was probably the closest equivalent this dimension had to a cotton turtle neck sweater.

If I didn't know any better, I'd swear this world is just one giant attempt to screw with my head.

Nevertheless, Shadow had no further chance to puzzle over current events as the show then began in earnest and a large cage was pushed on stage, containing a tiger – but it was a Sapient.

"Lords and Ladies, may I introduce you to my pride and joy; once feral king of the jungle, now tamed king of the arena – Rajah!" the aardvark shouted as he simultaneously opened the door and the tiger leapt out of it, giving a roar – or attempting to, anyway. To Shadow, who had heard actual feral tigers roar, creatures far more magnificent and about ten times as heavy as your average Mobian, it sounded rather pitiful, but was obviously enough to impress the audience.

Rajah was a young male, perhaps in his early twenties with broad shoulders, an angular face typical for his species and slender hips, but not wearing any clothing apart from his silver collar, as if to emphasise his supposedly feral state and that was probably also the reason why he was still moving on all fours. Shadow's eyes narrowed as he saw the collared Sapient leap onto one of the pedestals, though and noticed something odd about his spine...

It's deformed. I don't know whether they forced it into such a state or whether they've just had him walk on all fours for his entire life, but he probably couldn't even walk upright if he tried.

The aardvark's whip cracked and the tiger slave leapt through the first of the hoops, re-enacting a distorted version of a circus act Shadow had seen on human television shows aboard the ARK time and time again before. Except that this was even more cruel and the movements of its wretched protagonist appeared pained from his unnatural state...

"What is going on? I want to see!" Sonic twisted his head on the floor, trying without avail to look around the chairs and tables in his way.

"No," Shadow replied quietly, tonelessly. "You don't."

It got worse. The tiger was forced to jump through fire hoops that first scared and then burned him, Snively joking about his supposed 'feral stupidity' and the cries of pain of the Sapient were only made more dreadful when one thought he could hear the occasional intelligible word torn from abused lips amid the roaring. The assembled crowd seemed to love it, though. Shadow could only make out a few other faces apart from his own and Sally's that weren't amused.

The next number consisted of a sort of ballet performed by two siamese cat twins who Lazar announced as unparalleled in the gracefulness of their swaying steps – and Shadow never told Sonic that their feet had been bound. After that, it was another large cage that was moved onto the stage; it was shaped like an old-fashioned aviary...and it also contained an actual bird.

"Pleassse perk your earss for Wave the Ssswallow, honoured attendants!" Lazar announced grandly, "Having been raissed and kept in thisss cage for her entire life, her owner hass trained her to be the perfect ssongbird – a voice more beautiful than that of any sssentient singer, to be ssure, ssince sshe hass been trained relentlessssly – an imposssible feat if she hadn't been born a sslave, I'm ssure you would agree."

He exited the stage, and the purple-feathered feisty mechanic and member of the Babylon rogues who had given them so much trouble in their world did not even look after him, her blue eyes appearing like murky, dead waters. Only when she sang, it was as if one could watch the beauty of a soul briefly flying.

Shadow thought he even recognized the song – it was an old tune, one which his creator, Professor Gerald Robotnik had occasionally listened to because it had been a popular one when he had still been a young man. The black hedgehog briefly wondered how it was not only people, but apparently also things like ideas or art could exist in two worlds at once, but then supposed it didn't matter. He wondered whether it was deliberate cruelty to make her sing that song in particular, though...

"White bird,

in a golden cage

on a winter's day,

in the rain..."

She sang, only briefly pausing for breath and nearly all talking had ceased in the hall while even the slaves were listening now, ears of all shapes straining.

"White bird,

dreams of the aspen trees,

with their dying leaves,

turning gold...

But the white bird just sits in her cage,

growing old..."

Wave's voice sounded a lot softer than in their dimension, truly a master singer. Shadow thought he could even see some tears pool in the squirrel princess' eyes, but they stemmed from sadness at the girls fate and less from the perfection of her song as it neared its end.

"The leaves blow,

across the long black road,

to the darkened skies,

in its rage -

White bird must fly...or she will die...!"

There was a moment of silence as she had finished and then a clatter of applause, the Ultimate Lifeform able to tell how appalled the princess of Acorn had to be at this point. The song of the bird girl deprived of her freedom had probably broken her heart and yet these people wouldn't even now see the depravity of their system. At his feet, Sonic's gaze had darkened considerably like the skies in the song, the collared hero having been unable to see what had been going on, yet had heard enough.

"A wonderful sshow and ssurely a hard one to follow," Lazar had taken center stage again as the cage was moved back into one of the wings, Wave sitting in it motionlessly like a wind-up toy whose key had run out of turnings. "However, I have every confidence that the next performance will ssimply be exsscellent – " Lazar said, before shooting an almost predatory grin straight into the direction they were sitting in. "Prince Sshadow himsself and hiss newly acquired hedgehog Wild!"

The Ultimate Lifeform's face could have been chiselled in stone.

"What."

"You participate in this? Perhaps I shouldn't be surprised," Sally said next to him, now appearing similarly disgusted with both her neighbours.

"What?" Shadow asked again, slightly overtaxed at the moment.

"Go up there and give them a show they won't forget, my Prince," Rouge encouraged him. "After all, you've been telling the whole court for weeks it'll be something special."

"What?"

"Oy! Get a move on!" Sonic hissed from below and that finally prodded the black hedgehog back into action. He stood up mechanically, took up Sonic's leash from his backrest and began to walk past the clapping nobles toward the stage as if in a dream – or rather a nightmare.

"This is a disaster," he hissed, "We'll have to make our move now, leave them here standing and try to find the Emerald in the castle before they catch us. We can't get out of this otherwise."

"No," Sonic disagreed, "We won't ditch our plan so close to our goal. They wanted a show, I'm gonna give it to them."

"What?!" Shadow hissed again. "You can't! No matter the fact that we haven't planned anything at all, if you show anyone your speed publicly we lose any element of surpr-"

"Who's talking about a show based on speed?" Sonic asked back. "You make it sound like that was my only talent," he said, his face an expression of mock hurt. They were climbing the wooden stairs now and the applause was rising to a crescendo, fortunately completely concealing Sonic's words when he spoke the last phrase aloud. "No, Shads. Tonight, Sonic the Hedgehog's gonna dance."

And with that, the hero of Mobius all but dragged a horrified Ultimate Lifeform (who did very much not need to see the sonic-fied version of Aida) on stage. He grinned.

"Now tell them I need music."

xxx

"Look, I'm pretty sure someone, somewhere, is having it worse," Knuckles tried to cheer Tails up as they were all three of them sitting outside the counseling rooms in Ebony's office again. The kitsune only buried his face in his hands.

"Well, could you find out anything?" the black cat asked, looking at their review sheets again, or at least on the fox' one. Of Knuckles' there wasn't much left.

The echidna shook his head. "No, not much. Only that he has a real mean left hook," he said, at the same time holding his bruised eye. Ebony briefly wondered how well 'Patient might have been to boxing classes' would look on her report and felt her heart sink when she realized that all her other findings weren't much more helpful, either. Tails ran a hand through his headfur.

"Well...I got Sonic to admit that he lied about his childhood in a village, at least. But he still wouldn't tell me what he considers the actual truth."

"Hm, if we knew that we might make some progress," Ebony mused. "Whatever false memories he is instinctively trying to conceal could hold the key to the reason why he needed to delve into this fantasy world in the first place."

"Yeah, but I don't think he is going to tell us. He just went on and on how that would jeopardize Shadow."

"He told you this? He mentioned Shadow by name?" the cat asked. Tails shrugged.

"Well, not by name exactly, but unless this gets any weirder and there's a time-travelling police box in front of my window, I'm going to assume that when 'the Master' is mentioned he refers to Shadow," the young fox sighed wearily. "And if you ask me, the fact that he's saying Shadow of all people would need protection from anything but access to razor blades, it only proves he's even more out of touch with reality than we thought."

Knuckles scratched his head. "You know, the one thing I was actually surprised about when fighting Shadow in the room is that he wasn't actually that hard to overpower. He didn't use a Chaos Spear or Chaos Blast once, never mind Chaos Control. That was odd."

"Hmm," Tails mused. "I wonder whether it could have anything to do with the missing Emerald."

"You think it affected his powers?" the echidna asked. The fox kit nodded.

"Maybe. I think I'd like to run a few more Chaos Energy tests on him, in that case. Who knows, maybe it turns out he...absorbed it or something and that's were all the problems stem from. I don't know. Chaos is weird."

"So should we take them home again?" Knuckles suggested. Tails nodded again, tiredly. "...yeah. I'm sorry to have bothered you, Ebony. We'll call you if we find out anything, I promise, but I'd really need to get them back into my lab now."

"Your...laboratory?" the cat asked, a bit taken aback. "Why?"

"The end of the world might be in roughly 35 hours," Knuckles informed her. "One of the magic Emeralds is missing and we've been trying to retrieve it for days, see. That's why we're kind of in a hurry..." he explained, already following the fox kit out of the door. Ebony merely remained sitting dumbstruck on the couch for a moment, blinking her green eyes at thin air, and wondering how the phrase 'Crazy Patients have been removed from counseling premises by crazy friends,' could possibly sound good in a report...

xxx

In another dimension entirely, the beat had started. It was a simple rhythm, since neither the Chaotix band at the other end of the hall nor the Prince who had told them to play had any idea what they were supposed to sound like, but according to the collared hero's brief nod, it seemed adequate. Shadow watched Sonic close his eyes for a moment and take a deep breath, shoulders drooping and head lowered meekly, looking to all the world as if he were yet another slave forced to perform for his Master's pleasure, strain his body for display against his will. Of course, Shadow could tell that Sonic was merely concentrating, but the Ultimate Lifeform had enough trouble to keep from pulling at his own ears as his mind raced trying to figure out what on Earth the blue hedgehog was concentrating for.

And then, Sonic raised his head and emerald eyes snapped open, only a rakish grin briefly flitting across his face like a whip crack before the hero of Mobius got control over his features again and arranged them into a carefully expressionless mask - and then he was off.

Later, Shadow wished he had stopped Sonic right then and there.

The supposed slave of the Crown Prince stepped forward, but his movements were curiously light and springy, the blue hedgehog seeming as if he had wings on his feet and the beat already in his legs. Sonic rolled his shoulders, his arms swung back and forth once, twice, as the blue-furred speedster begun to briefly skip in a half-circle, forwards, sideways, backwards – before he threw himself down onto the floor.

The guests still looked on with a bit of confusion, fortunately therefore not noticing Shadow, who at the moment was rapidly working out what Sonic was up to…

And then the hero of Mobius danced.

Instead of falling onto his face, peach-furred arms came forward and Sonic caught himself easily on his hands, elbows bending as the lithe body went up, slender blue legs high in the air as they swung forward over his head, balancing for only a moment, before Sonic flipped back onto his feet in one smooth movement. A couple of little gasps of the audience had already been heard at the quick-footed move, but they rapidly lapsed into silence again as Sonic didn't stop - his backward flip transitioned into a backward drop as the hedgehog let his legs collapse underneath him, again catching himself with his hands as he went down on the floor, suddenly whirling his blue limbs about in the air like a many-legged spider as he supported himself on his paws and forearms only, his body still moving in time to the beat.

Shadow had trouble believing that Sonic the Hedgehog was the first slave in history who had just started break dancing at a medieval court.

"Oh no…"

Rouge and many others were wide-eyed, not having seen anything like this before. Sonic had started to spin on the floor, toned blue legs flying through the air like a windmill with sneakers and now the music started to speed up…

Shadow could virtually feel Sonic's small rush of excitement as he could hear the beat changing, and as a reaction the blue hero then actually started to spin on his head, taught legs straining upwards and arms stretched out. The assembled nobles were staring on goggly-eyed, a few servants even forgetting for a moment what they were here for.

Sonic's heart skipped a beat as the changed music reached his ears and a grin started tugging at his lips. Yes! They were getting into this!

The drum had started a more varied pattern and the tambourine was attempting to get in on the act. Sonic flashed a brief wink over to where the Chaotix were playing (and for some reason nearly startled them out of the rhythm) and then flipped himself back onto his feet in one whirl, again taking a few dancing steps to the side to warm up for his next move. Shadow had to admit that the fluid motions of his supposed slave's body were mesmerizing, the way his bare midriff stretched when he threw his limbs in the air, the subtlety with which muscles in his shoulders and torso strained as he tried to balance himself in his upside down freeze poses…

Sonic kicked upwards as if in battle, but did so with enough force to perform a back salto, eliciting a few small exclamations from the audience in the process as he straightened up again, and then Shadow knew that everything was truly lost. Sonic's lips had stretched into a full-fledged grin as the supposed slave was obviously about to give his all now, tripping the light fantastic with every fibre of his being.

The music had become ever more complex as the mis-matched band was starting to pick up the mood of the guests, Ray plucking at the deeper-tuned harp strings while the rhythm of the drum and the triangle pounced through the hall, making furry ears twitch as it beat a tattoo in their heads and letting gloved hands itch to clap in tune to the new and foreign sound. All eyes were glued to the display on stage where the single lone dancer seemed to radiate pure life like no one before. Mighty picked up his gittern and finally started to play…

This was it. The simple tune reached Sonic's ears and now nothing could stop him. The hero of Mobius somersaulted forwards, jumped and twisted in his flight as if his body was made of water and his spine of music, and came down only to roll onto his back, then part his legs like a V in the air, hips bucking upwards for a pose. Shadow briefly wondered whether the temperature in the room had risen or whether that was just him, but a brief look at the assembled females in the audience (and some of the males….) actually suggested otherwise. Sonic didn't pause (or notice where exactly Shadow had been staring for the past few moments…), throwing his arms up to grasp his ankles, before folding himself up like a jackknife, then rolling forward into a sitting position and pressing his torso flat on the floor between his legs…for a second. Before anyone had even realized what was going on, the collared hero had already twisted his hips, kicked his legs out from under him and twisted onto his back without his torso ever leaving the floor. Balls of sneaker-clad feet came down onto the wood with a thump! as the blue hedgehog now briefly suspended himself as if a reverse spider, before then launching into a seemingly endless series of spins on the ground, arms crossed across his chest, legs kicking through the air akin a tornado, face alight with daredevil enjoyment and emerald eyes blazing like summer lightning while none of the watchers could believe the sheer speed of his moves.

Sonic the Hedgehog, breakdancing for his life and his Master and loving every minute of it.

This…actually seems familiar…

Shadow had been watching his supposed pet with an equal mixture of rapt attention and rapidly rising feelings of dread concerning Black Doom's reaction, but that hadn't stopped the part of his mind that was forever expecting a fight from analyzing the hedgehog's moves throughout the show. Shadow had been trained as warrior by GUN aboard the ARK during the years of childhood and youth, sometimes cruelly and viciously so, but most of all effectively. It meant he had learned to recognize attack patterns of enemies quickly, understand the underlying strategy of their styles and now that was actually coming in handy. Sonic's performance seemed so familiar because Shadow had seen it all in battle before. Those kicks in the air had been aimed at his head a long time ago. Those twists on the floor were what had infuriated him whenever a swipe of his at the blue hedgehog had missed its mark and instead a blue leg came around to painfully connect with his back. The jumps and flips, the somersaults and trips, everything down to the attitude and fluid movements of the blue hedgehog in front of him were as much a part of Sonic's fighting style as energy lances and Chaos Control of Shadow's. The black hedgehog couldn't help but almost smirk. No wonder Sonic usually looked like he danced in battles.

On the stage, Sonic jumped like a jack and twirled like a twister, blue limbs a blur when he flick-flacked, cross-stepped and cart-wheeled on the spot. Muscles underneath silky fur let his dexterous body writhe and contorted as if whipped, but the only lash the hedgehog felt was the rhythm, his only master the music. Sonic was a physical creature through and through and never had it been plainer to Shadow than now, witnessing himself how more than anything else, movement was his hedgehog's element. The speedster's techniques were the same as in battle, but the aggressiveness Sonic displayed in fights was gone to be replaced by sheer joy…Shadow had never felt inclined to dance himself, but there was simply something about Sonic's general aura that always said 'come join me!' and right now he was sure he wasn't the only one who felt it. The blue hedgehog went into a hand-stand, knees bent and feet clapping in time to the beat as he hopped across the stage, never standing still. The Ultimate Lifeform's eyes could discern more than one silk-gloved hand in the audience secretly tapping as heads nodded in synch, the medieval world now introduced to street culture about 600 years too early. Hoo, boy…

The music was drawing to a crescendo. Sonic felt it and reacted accordingly. He spun on a single hand, briefly went down onto the floor again by rolling over his shoulder, then leapt up...and proceeded to defy gravity. The hero of Mobius grinned, executed a flying spinning kick as his body stretched in the air one last time just for Shadow, then turned that kick into a triple airborne somersault, before uncurling and landing on his feet with the grace of a one-winged angel. At last, he dropped to one knee, extended a hand and inclined his head in a bow.

Sonic the Hedgehog – indomitable hero, docile pet, royal pain, knight errant, personal slave, incessant comedian and world's best b-boy at your service.

And then there was a riot.

To be continued...