I only have one suggestion: maybe you should write out the numbers under twenty because that's what proper grammar calls for in all its confusing rules. The rest has great dialogue and descriptions. I like how Rouge acts with the five dollars. That seems very much like her. ^^
dun dun duuuuuuuuunnnnnn sorry couldn't resist nice cliffy by the way and I can't wait for more.
i just glad that there are people who like what im churning out.
There will be updates, but they wont be out so soon because of a bad patch im going through. Hope you guys understand. I'll try to get Chap 3 up as soon as i can.
Heh, even though I do not like Sonic being in his current position, I do hope he'll get out of there soon - please update? Your style is nice, and apart from not capitlaizing the 'I's, everything is just fine. :) *favs*
'In fact, his rumbling tummy was complaining so loudly he was certain the Egg Pawns outside would be able to detect it.' That reminds me of what Pooh Bear says. XD Any who, your dialogue is amazing. Great job on that. The surroundings could use a little more attention, but save for that this is fantastic. ^^
Not bad...in otherwords I like it....definatly interesting. You do a good job describing things
I really wanna find out what happens...plz do another chap!
this is starting to get interesting. I like how the suspense is building up =3
continue this story please
This is the first bit of writing I have read that has all characters perfectly in character. I look forward to reading more and seeing where this story is leading too. It looks like you will have a bit of trouble establishing a relationship between Sonic and Shadow, but that will make everything more interesting in the long run. I cant wait for an update. =D *Favs*
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